by Wesley
Home >> Culture for the hoi polloi
In San Sebastian, we have a very limited amount of cultural events and they are usually a concentrated number crammed into a week or a fortnight or a “festival.â€? By the time you find out about it, it’s nearly finished! The beginning and each following step of the process of culturalization is somewhat of a nightmare. Oh! What we must endure to hear a symphony or see a bit of independent cinema!
The first step is acquiring a ticket. You can buy a season pass but this is impractical not only because of its exorbitant price, but also because it is impossible that you would want to go to every single concert offered. Some, however, do. They are mostly retired folk who don’t really appreciate music but have money up the wazoo and nothing to do on any given evening of the year. They snatch up all the good seats before you even get a chance to decide that you want to go. Then one glorious morning the tickets go on sale. You must be on the Internet waiting for the moment, otherwise you’ll end up in row 8,432. If it’s the film festival we’re referring to, the seats aren’t numbered but all the good movies get sold out in a matter of seconds.
Once you’ve got your ticket, you very excitedly go to the event of your choice, whether it be Haydn, Shostakovich, or Mon Fils Ă Moi. You are immediately overwhelmed by the perfume your fellow concert attendees have previously bathed in. Once you finally get in, you find your seat. The event begins late because people are having uber-important conversations or trying to get into the bathroom before the concert. Any attempt to ring a bell to herd the people in is futile, at least the first two times.
The concert or film then begins and people have to wrap up their ultra-important conversations. This may go well into the incorrectly-applauded first movement or past the credits. Your evil eye goes unnoticed. They eventually stop but then inevitably some señora starts having hot flashes and whips out her fan. Pchpchpchpch… In the tensest moments or a flowing adagio, which require silence, there is coughing. This is not discreet coughing due to a tickle in the throat. This is phlegm-expelling, lung-clearing coughing. And it only happens in the quiet moments. If the performance happens to last longer than thirty minutes (most do), people begin to whisper, again completely oblivious to your most malicious glances. I particularly appreciate the conjectures as to how a film will end.
If the event happens to be a concert, there is an intermission. This is good if you have a weak bladder (and are of the masculine gender) or a smoker, but bad if you have no patience. You have to wait for everyone to leave, wait for everyone to relieve themselves, and wait for them to get back in when the bell again rings. Prepare the evil eye for another hour of coughing, fanning, and whispering. People are bored. They don’t want a second half. They just want to leave. Why don’t they?
Then the performance comes to an end. Once the applause begins, the Cinderellas start pushing and shoving to run out because they are late for…nothing. Be patient; it’s almost over. Do not think about the mindless chatter you are hearing. Think about the music you just heard or the film you just saw. Be patient. This is culture.
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Posted on http://www.weeklyletter.com at 2006-09-28 12:00:00 +0200
Copyright (C) ITT (http://www.itt.es) and Planet Lingua (http://www.lingua.es)
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Dear Wesley,
I have loved your letter and I am very sorry as you sometimes cannot enjoy the culture events because of the impolite people. I hate people whispering in the cinema or in a concert.
I love San Sebastian and I would like very much to go there during the film festival, so after reading your article I am less sad than before, because I think it would be very difficult to get tickets for the movies I would like to see and I cannot go to San Sebastian now… You are really lucky as for you is very easy to go to the film festival! The next time you go to see a movie or a concert hopefully you will not find people whispering or coughing near you…
I live in Madrid and we are in part lucky because here are a lot of cultural events like concerts, opera, theatre, etc. I have said lucky only in part because it is not cheap and sometimes very expensive (for example, opera). The other problem is that if you want to go to a concert you must look always the newspaper to know what is on. I do not understand why there is not publicity on the TV. Why does the TV’ programs tell always only about rock and pop concerts and hardly ever about opera and classical concerts? Perhaps because people are not really interested in culture.
Enjoy the Film Festival!
Regards,
Claudia
Hi Wesley,
You have forgotten the “palomitas” (popcorn)!!!!
I work directly with that world and I really think you’re right.
I can understand that some people does not know when to applaud in a concert of classic music (at some time it is necessary to learn) but I can’t stand people who doesn’t know how to behave according to the situation context…
Regards,
Gabriela
Once, at the Film Festival, I was watching a movie – I think it was “Amores Perros”. There was a very loud scene which was followed by a moment of sudden silence. The silence came so unexpectedly that we all heard someone fart. I tell you: that fart was fortissimo!!! Poor guy, he thought the cinema’s cutting-edge Dolby system or whatchamacallit was going to hide his fart.
Well, at least it didn’t smell!
Jean-Paul Sartre said ‘Hell is other people.’
Nowadays people are too used to electronic media and do not know how to appreciate live performance. I have twice published letters in El PaĂs complaining about musical theatre in Madrid. Without live musicians actually there in the theatre it is not a musical: it is theatre with sound effects. ‘Singing in the Rain’ (‘Cantando bajo la lluvia’) in the teatro Nuevo Apolo was as close to a theatrical robbery as I have seen. At least the water was real.
I used to play Irish music every Wednesday in a bar in San Sebastián. One day two young American gentlemen entered and sat close to the musicians. They then proceeded to talk as loud as you can without shouting. The talked during the jigs. They talked during the reels. They talked during the airs. When it came to my turn to sing, I asked them if our music was interrupting their conversation. To their credit, they then shut up and listened.
They weren’t especially bad people. They were just ignorant. Too much iPod and not enough iLive.
Seeing Dario Fo’s ‘Can’t Pay! Won’t Pay!’ (‘Aqui No Paga Nadie’) in the Teatro Infanta Isabel a year or so ago, a mobile phone rang in the middle of a scene. I almost felt sorry for the imbecile who had left his phone connected until he actually answered it in a loud voice.
‘Hello? Hello? Yes. No. I’m in the theatre!’
A lot of ordinary people ignore the arts because a lot of the arts ignore ordinary people. Nevertheless, treating live performances as if they were extensions of the TV, when the complete opposite is true, is unforgivable.
Wesley isn’t whining in this Weekly Letter. He is venting righteous anger.
Hello everyone!
I’ve never been in the San Sebastian’s Festival nor the city. I’ve surprised for your comments about the behaviour of the people. It’s incredible!. I’m sure that it was the first time to this person in this cultural events. Even more, prohibit this person the pass!. Sometimes the retired folk with a lot of time to waste are the worst, they can’t wait at the end of the performance to speak about it and have to whisper during it.
I’m completely agree with Gabriela about some things must be learnt in the school like a obligatory subject: how to behave in each context.
Apart of this, I’ve been this summer in a concert in Wien. In the row in front of me were Asian People, and were singing in low the melody of the songs they knew. At least they didn’t know so much!.
Those people could have been any people. I have seen that sort of thing in Asians and non-Asians alike.
I am Asian and I would never do that. My people don’t do that.
I was first taken to the opera at age 2. The Hamburg Opera, Madame Butterfly, Puccini. Training must begin early. It’s the only way.
Dear Wesley,
You are right, in my city Seville there aren’t many events, but the few ones that always exist are saturated. It happens now with the Biennial one of Flamenco. It is impossible to obtain earnings.
I have felt identified with your article, when finally you find an entry for the spectacle that he wants to see, there touch you a few slightly uncomfortable neighbors of armchair that does not allow you to enjoy, I remember when they saw ’ Les Luttier ’ do not know if he writes himself this way, but it was a real obstacle race to be able to see his spectacle.
The best thing after a good spectacle a good dinner is, so it is not necessary to run to take the car, there is always some nearby bar, at least here in Seville.
See you soon
Reyes..
My parents take me to a lot of cultural events. Because there are not too many in San Sebastian, we also go to the Teatro Arriaga in Bilbao, especially for plays, and to the Baluarte auditorium in Pamplona, where I saw the ballet Coppélia. Here in Donostia, for classical music, sometimes we use my grandparents’ season’s tickets to the big cube of the Kursaal. I prefer the concerts that are held in the small cube. I am never the only child in the audience, but there are always only a few others. There are “concerts for children� but I find them corny, just like storybooks with titles like “The Raspberry-Colored Dragon.� They teach us things as if we were babies. What I don’t like about the grown-up concerts are the encores. Two bises are okay, but one time, the old people kept clapping and clapping and the musicians did eight long encores. I was furious! More than concerts, I like the small shows they do at the cultural center of Egia. I remember a nice play about Helen Keller that used puppets, and a ballet show of children who have Down’s Syndrome. Yesterday was the last day of the San Sebastian Film Festival and I saw a silent movie by Ernst Lubitsch. The music was live piano. I enjoyed it a lot. Silent movies are like cartoons and the best for me are the Chaplin ones.
Hello Wesley,
I think that part of the problem is that we are not used to thinking about others, so people just tend to do whatever they feel like at any moment. It’s a matter of caring about others also.
Besides that I also enjoy going to culturals events: plays and movies mainly. Next play I’m watching is “Esperando a Godot” this week, I hope I can fully enjoy it and I’ll try not to caugh ;)
Regards to everyone,
Cristina
Hello everyone:
Great article! I left going to the cinema as much because of these people. Now I prefer to watch films at home in DVD. It is a shame that it isn’t possible to do the same with plays of the theatre!
Greetings
MarĂa
PD. Wesley – I’ve noticed that your photo you look to Kimi Raikonnen from Formula 1! Is he one of your brothers? (it is joke – but you do look to him!)
Thank you all for your comments. I’m glad you agree and that I didn’t come off as being a “cascarrabias.”
1. I really enjoy the film festival, even though there are talkers. On Friday I was next to two talkers, not whisperers, talkers, WHY? And thank God popcorn and other food is not allowed in the film festival!
2. “Hell is other people” is a slight exaggeration, don’t you think? Although Paola’s anecdote comes close to it… Singing in the Rain reminded me of when Simone went to see The Nutcracker. Ballet to a CD is just not the same.
3. The hummers of unspecified origin reminded me of Fazil Say, a pianist who hums his music off tune as he plays. I was, at first, irritated with the person who was humming along. Then I realized it was him!
4. Indeed, a nice dinner should follow a performance, something easy to find in our cities!
5. Take kids to concerts. They’ll learn to be quiet and enjoy it; but only if you do!
6. Finally, I am not sure that I look so much like Kimi Raikonnen, but I will take that as a compliment! ;-)
Dear Kimi …
Any idea I had of the concert or film turning out well was shattered the moment I read the beautifully explicit words “phlegm-expelling”!!!
You’ve painted a picture, as they say, too well!!
It’s nice to be on holiday.
Ciao
It is indeed nice to be on holiday, whoever you are…